“Go fuck yourself.” All TMOS episodes should start and end with those words. Just to make sure everything is clear. “Suck a D” is also acceptable.

I am sorry, but I cannot remember how to say any of that in Spanish.

Mike is right, the worst thing I did was go right to a regular college after school. I should have either taken a year off, or at least just gone to community college so I could screw around on the cheap.

I love Oscar because he embraces his depravity so completely. Luckily he knows Spanish, because I can only assume that asking for “El Hando Jobo” would get a guy no where. Facials are always funny.

Is it pervy to get excited when a hot female barber or dentist accidently rubs her boobs on my shoulder?

“When I did do it with a man the first time…” Ok, that made me giggle.

Unlike Mike, I actually enjoy Buzz’s sex stories. They fascinate me.

“My wife.” El Oh El.

Do you know what is behind the art of massage? SCIENCE!

“Please to describe the size of your cocktail.” Well that’s inappropriate I think.

What is with wives? When I want to be left alone because I am working on a project, or trying to handle the finances, or even just really focused on a video game, she is hanging over my shoulder. Lady, I am your husband, not a clown for your amusement. Get a hobby.

Ending the show on implied incest is brilliant.